8 Reasons to HATE Valentine’s Day

Here comes the overly commercialised, pressure-laden holiday we all love to hate. There are many reasons to dread the annual bright-pink festival of sap - so let’s commiserate! 


If you are a woman…

Reason #1: You can’t moan about it.

Phone Call (oil on canvas), Robert Burkall Marsh,  Private Collection  © Robert Marsh. All Rights Reserved 2023  Bridgeman Images


If you are single, people assume you are a spinster with two cats.

A Young Woman Lion Tamer, Europe, c.1890, Frédéric Boissonnas, (1858-1946)  © Progettali  Bridgeman Images


If you are in a relationship, people assume you’ve hit a rough patch.

The First Cloud, c.1887 (oil on canvas), William Quiller Orchardson, (1832-1910)  National Gallery of Victoria, Melbourne, Australia  National Gallery of Victoria, Melbourne  Bridgeman Images


Reason #2: Cringeworthy poetry

The Language of Letters, 1931 (gelatin silver print photomontage, with airbrush and gouache), Herbert Bayer, (1900-85)  Private Collection  Photo © Christies Images  Bridgeman Images

Victorian Valentine Card, English School, (19th century)  The Cheltenham Trust and Cheltenham Borough Council  © The Wilson  Bridgeman Images


Reason #3: You feel undue pressure to lose weight, especially if there’s a chance he’ll buy you lingerie.

Advertisement for Kino underwear, c.1950 (colour litho), French School, (20th century)  Private Collection  © Archives Charmet  Bridgeman Images


Reason #4:  All displays of perfect coupledom serve only to reinforce the sneaking suspicion that everyone else is far more in love and having twice as much fun as you.


The Cruel Sister, 1851 (oil on canvas), John Faed, (1820-1902) / Bury Art Museum & Sculpture Centre, UK / © Bury Art Museum & Sculpture Centre / Bridgeman Images

Lovers, from the Science of Erotics, the Kama-Sutra, Himachal Pradesh, Pahari School, Indian School  Victoria & Albert Museum, London, UK  Bridgeman Images


If you are a man…

Reason #5: You feel undue pressure to be the perfect prince charming, which includes having to recite the aforementioned cringeworthy poetry


La Belle Dame Sans Merci, 1902 (oil on canvas), Frank Dicksee, (1853-1928)  Bristol Museum and Art Gallery, UK  © Bristol Museums, Galleries & Archives  Given by Mrs Yda Richardson, 1913.  Bridgeman Images

Reason #6:  Fear that women have a singular focus this time of year, and that she is already making plans for your future life together in complete wedded bliss.


A Gipsying Party Returning Home Through a Storm, published by Thomas McLean, London, 1827 (coloured etching), Theodore Lane, (1800-28)  Private Collection  The Stapleton Collection  Bridgeman Images

Reason #7:  You have to shell out tons of money to buy cliche tokens of affection that never quite hit the mark.


Darling Im Home, 2006 (oil on canvas), Victoria Webster,  Private Collection  © Victoria Webster. All rights reserved 2023  Bridgeman Images


Reason #8:  Forget to do anything about it and you’re history!


Judith (oil on canvas), Mario Balassi, (1604-67)  Musee des Beaux-Arts, Nantes, France  Bridgeman Images


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